Book Review: The Silent Patient

I just finished reading this Novel “The Silent Patient”. One day my wife came home from a book store and gave me this novel and asked me to read. When I got the novel from her, I quickly scanned it and made mind to read it. In fact I hadn’t read any book in the past few months and had been spending too much time on Neflix and social media. So just to re-cultivate the habit of reading books to which I was once addicted I started reading this book.

I would say the Novel is interesting and  filled with suspense and thrillers. The main strength of the Novel is, it can hook the readers throughout every pages and the readers will always have a feeling of “what will happen next?” at the end of every chapter. The Novel is about the story of an artist (Painter) who is admitted in a pschyiatric rehabilitation centre because of her mental condition and with the accusation of killing her husband who is a photographer. A therapist who has good intention of treating the artist applies for the job in the rehabilitation centre just to get close the artist, but in the end he turns out to be the murder of the artist’s husband. So this is the whole story in 3 lines. But the Novel has many twists and turns in the story and never fails to disappoint its readers. So in overall a good book for those who are interesting in reading thrillers and suspenses.

Joining PhD had always been a dream for me. After completing my Masters in Public Health (MPH) in 2010, I wanted to work for few years and then wanted to do PhD. But when engaged in development field, you are so much occupied by the deadlines, field visits, trainings, workshops and reports you hardly have any time to think about your academic career. This happened to me as well. Immediately after completing MPH, I started working in a very reputed international organisation working in the field of HIV in Nepal and after 3 years switched to another organisation. After after working in that organisation for five years I went to Bangkok to work in another INGO in a regional program for Asia Pacific region. The career ladder was moving a head and I was juming from local NGO to INGO at national level and then to international level and the dream of pursuing PhD was somewhere lost in this trajectory. After working in Bangkok for two years, the COVID pandemic emerged and there was family pressure to come back to home, so I returned to Kathmandu by accepting offer from another organistion where the job was regional (Nepal, India and Bangladesh) but the position was home based. I got the type of job that I was exactly looking for. When I was relocated to Kathmandu from Thailand, I had to make a long circle around the globe as I had to travel to Dubai from Bangkok and then to Kathmandu from Dubai as the direct flight from Bangkok to Kathmandu was still not resumed due to COVID. The job that I was working in Kathmandu was FCDO (former UKaid) funded program and nine months into that job, there was a major decision from the funder that they are not going to continue the program due to COVID-19. After nine months of coming back to Kathmandu from Bangkok, I was jobless. And I was jobless for the first time in Aug 2021 since completing my Masters in Dec 2010. For first few months I enjoyed my free days. But slowly after few months I started getting bored and started hunting for jobs and consultancy opportunities. Slowly I got some consultancies and was still looking for job. And suddenly my passion for PhD emerged again. As I was free, I registered for IELTS and appeared in an IELTS exam by doing some online preparaton in home. And in few days after the IELTS result was out, I saw a adverstisement for PhD studentship which somehow matched my profile and was asking for IELTS 7.0 score. Luckily my score was enough for this application. I got shortlisted, appeared in the interview and I was offered PhD. Finally, I was enrolled in PhD. Connecting the dots.....I can see that the decision to come back to Kathmandu from Thailand, accepting the offer from another organistion for a home based job, the pullout of the program by the donor for which I was working, me being jobless for few months and my decision to appear in IELTS examination.......I can now connect the dots and see the link.

Finally, I was in for PhD. The course starts in April 2023....everything goes smooth. I complete all the assignments, attend all the meetings, complete all the project work, do everything that was required for the project. I was like a nursery kid again doing all the homework and classwork on time. In Feb 2024, I submit the Year 1 progress report and appear in Viva as per the University requirement. This is just like an annual examination in school where you are decided whether you can go to the I next class or you should stay in same. I did all the preparation from my side in close consultation with the supervisors, submitted the report and appeared in viva. In viva also in my perception everything went fine and answered everything perfectly. I appeared in Viva in the end of Feb 2024 and was expecting the result in two weeks. However I got the result only in the mid of May. In the result report that I received from graduate school there were lots of comments that I need to address and resubmit the report again. This was completely in opposite to what I had expected and I was a little bit frustrated too. It took some time for me to recover from this trauma as it was completely unexpected for me. But there is nothing I can do against this. The only option for me is to diligently address all the comments and suggestions that the examiners have asked me to do and resubmit the report in three months time. And this will ultimately help in making the PhD thesis more stronger. So I just need to have patience, work with supervisors, work on the comments from supervisors, work on the report everyday, do some literature search and study everyday and aim for submitting the report on time. And I am confident that I can turn all this around swiftly.

Day 5 of IF

Today is the fifth day of IF. The scale doesn't show any changes, however I'm happy that I complied with the commitment and kept the promise. In each day since the start of IF; I have been eating dinner in between 7:00 to 8:00 PM and the meal next day sometimes in between 12:00 to 1:00 PM. This usually results in 16 hours of fasting window and 8 hours of eating window. Living in a family with a kid and different family members with different diet requirements it is very difficult to stick with exact time schedule for the lunch and dinner. Though I need to eat lunch at 2:00 PM to meet the cycle of 18/6 its very difficult to wait until 2:00 PM for the lunch. I need to adjust with the time schedule of other family members as well. However from the next week I will try my best to increase the fasting window to 18 hours. 

One thing that baffles me is why there has been no any significant weight loss in past five days ? Or is it too early for me to expect reduction in weight in just five days. Yes that may be true. However one thing that I need to improve myself is controlling the diet during eating window and doing some moderate level exercises. I didnt do any exercise thinking that if I do exercise it may increase my hunger and may result in eating more once I break the fasting. But from some reading as of now; I think I can exercise sometime in between 4-7 PM just before my last meal. I also think it would be good idea; because if I do exercise during fasting window the hunger may increase and I may end of eating more. So from next week I will jjoin Gym and start doing moderate exercise sometimes in between 5-7 PM. Also another mistake in past five days was eating too much after breaking the fasting and the food was mostly rice. In the coming week I need to strict white rice to only one mean and add more complex carbs like roti and more vegetables in the dinner.

Following will be the action point for coming days to reduce the weight by 2 kg per week for every week;

• Increase the fasting window to 18 hours.
• Eat rice only on one meal and add roti in one meal.
• Engage in some form of physical activity in between 5-7 pm (either join GYM or go for brisk walking)
• Eat more fruits and vegetables.
• Do some yoga and meditation in the morning.
• Not more than 3 meals during the eating window.

So with all these action plans the target is to reach in between 68-70 KG by the end of March.

Intermittent Fasting

After many failed attempts of reducing weight, I decided to go with the recent trend of Intermittent Fasting (IF). Although fasting has existed culturally in our society for long; in recent time it has also become a part of life for staying physically fit. Today was my first day of IF and just finished my fasting window. Yesterday night I ate my dinner at 7:00 PM and didn't eat anything except water until 12:00 AM today (16 hours of fasting since last meal). The experience on the first day was good. And there was no any problem. Although there was some craving for hunger at 10:00 am in the morning i somehow managed it. I also did some yoga and meditation which might keep me motivated in this plan. I plan to continue this for next two months and see good results

Life is like riding a bicycle….to have a balance you must keep on moving

I left my first job at a local NGO in Pokhara in 2008 to pursue my master’s degree in public health (MPH) in Institute of Medicine (IOM); Kathmandu. Had I remained satisfied to my bachelor’s degree; my job in a NGO and my carefree life at Pokhara; I would have never been at the place where I’m today. “A journey of thousand mile begins with a first step” and leaving a job in Pokhara and moving to Kathmandu for master’s degree was my first step in a mile-long journey of life. After completing my MPH I joined one of the most reputed INGO in the field of HIV in the role of program officer with my station in Dhangadi of Kailali district. This was one of the most remarkable milestones in my career. With in three years tenure in this organisation I moved from Dhangadi to Pokhara and then to Kathmandu. In three years of my professional career in this organisation I was amidst a super professional and high performing team constantly monitored and coached by supportive & care taking supervisors. There was nothing to complain despite some overpressure during some day of the week. After three years I decided to move to another organisation. Change is necessary for growth of individual and organisation. I think the desire for change at that time forced me to change this organisation. After this organisation I joined another renowned organisation working globally in the field of child rights and implementing global fund program in Nepal. During five years tenure I got everything a public health professional wants in his career. Delegation of important tasks to me by the supervisors; exposures in the national and international forums; trust on me by my colleagues and opportunity to take lead role in role out of some national level key activities sharpened my public health skills. I was fully satisfied in my role and giving my hundred percent. Despite having everything a public health professional wants sometimes I felt like something was missing. I don’t know why but the inner intuition in me was telling that after working more than ten years in the field on HIV and having so much experience it’s time to search for international job now. Though there was enough in my plate; I still had an appetite for international job. After one year of vigorous search I finally landed in an Australian organisation working in eight countries of Asia Pacific Region. It was like a dream come true for me. My first international job and staying and working outside the country for a long term for the first time. I was super excited. The first few months went very fine. I was with my wife and enjoying the extravagant and lavish life style in the fastly booming city of Asia. My employer is still processing for work visa and I may need to travel back and forth untill this is settled. And this sometimes force me to think “did I make right decision?’. Yes I have made right decision. Change was necessary and I did it. I sometimes relate this to the famous quote “Life is like riding a bicycle. To have a balance you have to keep up moving. If you stand in same place for long you are likely to fall.” Absolutely true…..I have moved for balance. So no regrets………..Standing still in same place for long takes you nowhere.

Movie Review "Jatrai Jatra"

There are very few movies which have taken Nepali movie standard to new height. To name some among these are "Jatra" and its squeal "Jatrai Jatra". The common feeling most audience have while watching most Nepali movie in hall is; very poor acting; unrealistic scenes; undigestible dialogues and poor comedy if there are any some comedy scenes. Most of the times while watching Nepali movie its very painful to sit patiently for around three hours and watch the movie till end. But the movie "Jatra" and its sequale "Jatrai Jatra" has changed the whole dynamics of Nepali movie. Unlike other nepali movies you dont feel disconnected to the movie scenes. Each and every scene in this movie relates to daily activity of every Nepalese citizens. You are not forced to laugh by undigestible forceful comedy scenes. The small comedy scenes are interwined and plotted to an interesting story line to which each and every audience feels connected. This is the most strong part of the movie Jatrai Jatra. Besides this the acting of three lead characters Phanindra; Munna and Yas is superb; realistic and down to earth. The lead actress Sampu (Barsha) and the child actor Iman had done full justice to their role. The new characters added in the sequale "Daya Hang Rai" and "Raja Ram Paudel" have also done damn super good job. The cinematography is superb specially in the last part of movie which shows the scene of Pokhara and Phewa lake. In some of the movie plots there are some unrealistic turns and sudden change in plots which is a bit weird. Otherwise the movie is flawless and fully entertaining.

Moving to New Place

After working for more than three years in a USAID funded project and almost five years in a Global Fund funded project in Nepal; I had made decision that its now time to move on and look for international job. Before making this decision I had tried for PhD desperately in many institutions but I must say luck didn’t favor me and I never got tempting offer for PhD. Though there were some offers for self-funded PhD I didn’t like the idea of going for self-funded PhD by leaving a good paying job back in home. After many unsuccessful attempts for PhD I consoled myself saying international jobs should be the next in pipeline for me. Then I started hunting for the international job. But it was not as easy as I had imagined.

Though there was no any specific preference for international job; I had always wished I could start from one of the Asian countries. Due to the family reason also it was very important for me to shift to any Asian country. After hundreds of applications and a few interviews I was finally offered a place  by a Australian organisation implementing Global Fund  regional grant in Asia Pacific region. I was so desperate for international job that I couldn’t make any comparisons or negotiate with the current or new organisation and made the instant decision. I was determined that I must move on and staying in same place for a long time will bring saturation and some frustration at some point in time. So without any second thought I made decision to move  for new responsibility in a new organisation.

A regional hub of Asia; a city of expats; a fastly booming economy; a city of angels; best destination for students looking for quality education in low price and many more. A city that has everything for everyone. I was super super excited to be living in the city for at least next two years. (Though the contract is for three years my plan is to live in the city for at least two years).

It has been just three months since I moved to new job. In the past three months I had been busy in adjusting myself to the hustling and bustling life of new city. The major things that I did in past three months besides the regular office work are; I moved to an apartment; tried learning a little bit of local language and visited a beach during long weekend. My office is processing work permit and looks like it takes some more days. Otherwise I’m enjoying and having a good time in new city.